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Infertility is a woman's problem.
This is untrue. It surprises most people to learn
that infertility is a female problem in 35% of the
cases, a male problem in 35% of the cases, a combined
problem of the couple in 20% of cases, and unexplained
in 10% of cases. It is essential that both the man
and the woman be evaluated during an infertility work-up.
Everyone seems to get pregnant
at the drop of a hat.
More than five million people of childbearing age
in the United States experience infertility. When
you seek support, you will find that you are not alone.
Join RESOLVE, a support group, or talk with others
who are struggling to build a family, so that you
won't feel isolated.
It's all in your head! Why
don't you relax or take a vacation. Then you'll get
pregnant!
Infertility is a disease or condition of the reproductive
system. While relaxing may help you with your overall
quality of life, the stress and deep emotions you
feel are the result of infertility, not the cause
of it. Improved medical techniques have made it easier
to diagnose infertility problems.
Don't worry so much -- it just
takes time. You'll get pregnant if you're just patient.
Infertility is a medical problem that may be treated.
At least 50% of those who complete an infertility
evaluation will respond to treatment with a successful
pregnancy. Some infertility problems respond with
higher or lower success rates. Those who do not seek
help have a "spontaneous cure rate" of about
5% after a year of infertility.
If you adopt a baby you'll
get pregnant!
This is one of the most painful myths for couples
to hear. First it suggests that adoption is only a
means to an end, not a happy and successful end in
itself. Second, it is simply not true. Studies reveal
that the rate for achieving pregnancy after adopting
is the same as for those who do not adopt.
Why don't you just forget it
and adopt? After all, there are so many babies out
there who need homes!
For many, adoption is a happy resolution to infertility.
However, most people explore medical treatment for
infertility prior to considering adoption. In addition,
traditional adoption options have changed, and adoption
can be more costly and time-consuming than expected.
It is, however, still possible to adopt the healthy
baby of your dreams. There are also many older children
and children with special needs available for adoption.
Maybe you two are doing something
wrong!
Infertility is a medical condition, not a sexual disorder.
My partner might leave me because
of our infertility.
The majority of couples do survive the infertility
crisis, learning in the process new ways of relating
to each other, which deepens their relationship in
years to follow.
Perhaps this is God's way of
telling you that you two aren't meant to be parents!
It is particularly difficult to hear this when you
are struggling with infertility. You know what loving
parents you would be, and it is painful to have to
explain to others that you have a medical problem.
Many women in the Bible experienced infertility including
Elizabeth, Sarah, and Hannah.
Infertility is nature's way
of controlling population.
Zero population growth is a goal pursued in a time
of world overpopulation, but it still allows for couples
to replace themselves with two children. Individuals
or couples can certainly elect the option to be childfree
or to raise a single child. Infertility, for those
who desire children, denies them the opportunity to
choose.
I shouldn't take a month off
from infertility treatment for any reason... I just
know that this next month will be THE one!
It is important periodically to reassess your treatment
and your parenting goal. Continuity in treatment is
important, but sometimes a break can provide needed
rest and renewal for the next steps.
I'll be labeled a 'trouble
maker' if I ask too many questions.
The physician/patient team is important. You need
to be informed about what treatments are available.
What is right for one couple may not be right for
another, either physically, financially, or emotionally.
Don't be afraid to ask questions of your doctor. A
second opinion can be helpful. If needed, discuss
this option with your physician.
I know I'll never be able to
stop treatment until I have a pregnancy.
Pregnancy is not the only pathway to parenthood. You
may begin to think more about parenthood than about
pregnancy. You may long for your life to get back
to normal. You may consider childfree living or begin
to think of other ways to build a family.
I've lost interest in my job,
hobbies, and my friends because of infertility. No
one understands! My life will never be the same!
Infertility is a life crisis -- it has a rippling
effect on all areas of your life. It is normal to
feel a sense of failure that can affect your self-esteem
and self-image. You will move through this crisis.
It is a process, and it may mean letting go of initial
dreams. Throughout this process, stay informed about
the wide range of options and connect with others
facing similar experiences.
Statistics from RESOLVE of Alabama
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